Cultivating Resilience: The Crucial Role of Mattering and Relationships

Resilience is a term that frequently circulates in discussions when it comes to workplace wellbeing, as well as individuals mental health and around performance reviews.

The ability to bounce back from challenges, adapt to change and consistently perform at our best has been seen as a hallmark of professional success. Yet, when it comes to enhancing resilience in employees, especially those facing extended leave or challenges (personally or professionally), the traditional training methods we've often relied upon may not be hitting the mark.

I’ve been thinking, after listening to a podcast on this topic, that the fundamental piece to this puzzle that we may not be considering is the psychological concept of mattering.

That is our deep-seated and vital need to feel valued and make meaningful contributions.

The repercussions of not feeling mattered are significant, encompassing feelings of loneliness, despair and anxiety. And given many of us are living in an environment where their need for mattering often remains unmet, this might just be contributing to our levels low levels wellbeing, engagement and the complexity of our workers compensation cases.

Conversely, when we feel like we matter, we step out into the world with a positive outlook, achieve in healthy ways and want to give back to society, whether that be through small acts of kindness such as a text or a coffee with a friend or colleague.

On the flip side, when the feeling of mattering is not being met, we might find ourselves withdrawing inwardly or outwardly via unproductive behaviours.

Professor Michael Cavanagh, an expert in this field, defines resilience as an emergent property of relationships, highlighting the importance of these connections in the development and sustenance of resilience.

Another piece of research states that one hour of deliberate and authentic support each week has been shown to enhance an individual's resilience. This reinforces the the vital role that relationships and connections play in the resilience-building process. The data also supports the questions around how and why coaching works.

Whilst cultivating and building resilience is complex, a simple yet powerful action such as appreciation could be the start and doesn’t cost anything.

By appreciating others and expressing your appreciation for others, we unlock the sense of mattering in them and within us. Kindness and care toward those we encounter in our daily lives becomes the building blocks of a more resilient team or organisation.

So, the next time you find yourself picking up your phone to read a message during a meeting or glued to your laptop, take a moment to reflect on the message you might be inadvertently sending to your colleagues – that they don't matter

The road to resilience isn’t about embracing the latest off the shelf training package. It's about recognising the innate need for mattering and nurturing relationships that provide the support and validation necessary for an individual to flourish when facing challenges or just the daily grind of life.

When employees feel valued and supported, they become the bedrock of organisational success.